The other night, hubby and I were talking in bed when I said: "I still think that Mother Nature should have biologically linked the father of a baby to it so that when a baby is born, the father starts to lactate too. This would ensure that at least one parents could feed it, both could bond with it if they wanted, and it would come in handy if you had twins or more. Not to mention, just think if you weren't sure who the father was, just keep an eye on the candidates to see which one starts producing milk! :-) "
James laughs. "Yeah, but I still like that old joke about the doctor that invented the machine."
"Remind me?"
James snuggles up to me and gets comfy. "A couple goes into the Hospital to have a baby and the doctor says: I've invented a machine that allows the father to share some of the pain of labor. You want to try it?
The husband says sure and the doctor turns it on low. The husband says: This is nothing, turn it up! The doctor complies by turning it up halfway but the husband simply shrugs. This is still nothing, turn it all the way up!
The doctor is nervous. Are you sure??? The husband is sure so the doctor cranks it all the way up and the wife delivers her baby pain free. Later on, they are discharged from the hospital and go home, only to find the mailman laying dead in front of their porch. Ba-da-dum!"
I laugh and then we went to sleep.
Yesterday, as we were out and about for Phoenix's birthday, my hubby tells me. "I never really understood it before, but now I do."
"Huh?"
"How you could tell me that I did something in one of your dreams that pissed you off and so you got mad at ME. Well, last night, I had a dream in which I wanted to kill all three of you because in the dream, I came home from school to find that you had left the baby in it's carrier ON THE PORCH in the dead of WINTER! It was still alive, but I wanted to toss all three of you out to see how you liked it!"
"Oh man! Honey, I would never do that!"
"I know, but still, you came to bed right about them and I wanted to punch you and chuck you out of the bed!"
I laughed. "Well I'm glad you didn't!"
Well no wonder he was cranky, lol!
